Pandemic Update
I
went to a dinner party last night, where I and other
guests enjoyed copious
amounts of alcohol. I awoke this morning not feeling
well, with what could be described as flu-like
symptoms; headache, nausea, chills, sore
eyes etc.
From
the results of some initial testing, I have
unfortunately tested positive
for Wine
Flu..This
debilitating condition is very serious and it
appears this is not an isolated
case.
Reports
are flooding in from all around the neighbourhood of
others diagnosed
with Wine Flu.
To anyone that starts to exhibit the
aforementioned tell-tale signs,
experts are
recommending a cup of tea and a bit of a lie
down.
However, should your condition
worsen, you should immediately hire a DVD
and take
some Nurofen [Nurofen seems to be the only drug
available that has been proven to help
combat this unusual type of flu]. Others are reporting
a McDonald's
Happy Meal or a Kebab can also help in some
cases.
Wine Flu does not need to be life
threatening, and if treated early can
be erradicated
within a 24-48 hour period. If not, then further
application of the original liquid in similar
quantities to the original dose has
been shown
to do the
trick.
Good
luck!!!
